A Big Girls Affair With Food

I know 'My 600-lb Life' is in its 8th season, but I just started watching and all I can say is wow! Though I've only watched two episodes, those courageous women taught me something about myself. When I watched those women, I realized that overeating is not just eating and neither is it just an addiction; it's spiritual. I say that because it wasn't until after I stopped having premarital sex, that I realized my sexual addiction was more than physical, it too was spiritual. Now don't go gettin' all spooky on me. When I say spiritual, I simply mean an influence. Influencing me byway of what I paid attention to, such as the sexually explicit music, shows, and conversations I held with other sexually addicted adults. I was consumed in my thoughts which only gave way to me acting out on my sexual desires to the point that I knew I was out of control. 

Lusty Looks

Fast forward and after fifteen years without it...yep, that's right! I've been 'yet holding' for 456 months or 5,475 days. I've faithfully kept these big ole yellow legs closed for approximately 131,400 hours and after many hours of study, I now realize that there was a spiritual influence behind my out of control sexual appetite. And I now see that the same is true for my appetite for food. But it wasn't until I watched the way those women looked at food that I realized, their looks were lusty. In that they looked intently into the eyes of those biscuits as if they literally wanted to sop it up. The way they pined over each meal reminded me of two adulterous lovers. They knew they weren't supposed to be together, yet their sexual appetites kept them coming back for more. Those women instinctively know how to eat in moderation, but that next bite keeps calling them...calling them. And because I know the voice of Cocoa Pebbles so well, I've answered its lusty calls to indulge in an explicit food affair. What about you? 

Late Night Hookups

If you've ever answered the can-I-come-over call of a piece of pizza after you knew it was too late to eat or smiled inwardly when you saw the come-get-me texts of a burger in the middle of the night, then you know what I mean. And though it seems like its just food, there's something spiritual influencing us to do it. So how can we stop? I truly don't know because I'm still trying to wean myself out of my food affair. But I will tell you this. If we have to do what I had to do to stop having premarital sex, then it's going to take a lot of time in the Word and on our knees to walk away from the lust of food. I'll keep you posted on how it works out. But until then, call a duck a duck. If you're overweight, you too are having a food affair and prayerfully one day, you'll get caught.

Copyright 2018 © Real Issues Publishing®. All rights reserved.

No Room For The Plus-Sized

email:stacisweetandco@gmail.com to buy!

 :)

So, I’ve recently started to work on my exit strategy. No longer am I talking or thinking about it, it’s time to put feet to this thing. I’m ready to start doing what I was created to do - full-time. And though I admire @IAmSteveHarvey, bestselling author of ‘Jump: Take the Leap of Faith toAchieve Your Life of Abundance’, I refuse to. That’s because I’ve felt froggy three times before and each leap led me into homelessness. So, this time, at 47, I’m being more strategic. Slowly preparing myself to write full-time. I’ve even cut my hours. Instead of working 40 hours a week, I work 37.5. The remaining time I call seed. Get it. ‘…seedtime and harvest.’ (Genesis 8:22) Yep, each week I dedicate those 2.5 hours (or more) towards working in the field; diligently working on several books, writing posts for my blogs and now, I’m venturing into freelancing.

An Upwork Leap®

I recently registered with Upwork®; ‘the world's largest online workplace where savvy businesses and professional freelancers go to work¹.’ Only they won’t let me work. In the words of @DJ Khaled, ‘They don’t want me to be great.’ That’s because when I submitted my profile for review my headline read, ‘Curvy Plus Size Blogger’, while my description said, 

Need someone who can challenge your astute plus-size readers while simultaneously keep-it- one hundred with the thick chicks who flock to your blog? Because if that’s you, then I’m your Curvy Blogger. I understand the complexities of your brand. You’re a Lifestyle Blog who needs someone who has a refreshing take on simple subjects like health, fitness, beauty and fashion while at the same time being able to tackle tough topics like weight discrimination, size settling, and faith and sexuality. Though you want to you ensure your readers walk away with life-changing a-ha moments, you’re also practical which means you also want to be assured that each post is filled with content-rich keywords that’ll boost your SEO while simultaneously generating the hearts, likes, followers, shares, subscribers, and more importantly, the sales your brilliant brand needs. If that’s you, nice to meet you. My name is Staci and I’m ready to blog for you.

I know its not perfect, but it gets to the heart of what I do. And if you’re seeking a plus-size blogger, come from the plus-size community, or are a curvaceous woman yourself, then you get it. But apparently, the folks at Upwork® didn’t. Which is understandable, so I included:

• Current retail customer service associate for foremost high-end retailer. 
• Certified Life Coach and Author specializing in Singles Issues.
• Bridal, Food, Lifestyle, and Life Coaching Blogger
• Expertise in social media management for small business owners to include Life, Personal Development and Executive Business Coaches.
• Experienced also in Call Center and Performance Management, Real Estate Certified with Mortgage Banking Coursework.

When you combine the two, its not hard to ascertain that I’m a sister with a business background. No, I’m not a degreed professional, but I can do my thing. But again, the good folks at Upwork® thought otherwise because I received the following response:

In case you couldn’t see it, it reads, ‘We’ve reviewed your profile and currently our marketplace doesn’t have opportunities for your area of expertise.’ Oh, you mean the area of the plus-size fashion; who by the way is a 10 billion dollar a year industry² according to IBIS World? Oh, that are, yeah right. 

Was it the ‘Curvy’ or the ‘Plus-Size’ Descriptor?

As a woman of color, I could have easily become offended and thought this was racial because clearly the words ‘curvy’ and ‘plus-size’ scream ethnicity. But because I know this is a global freelancing platform, its safe to assume that wasn’t the only reason for their decision. Which got me to thinking? Could this also be weight discrimination? To assume that none of their ‘five million registered clients³’ would need a Curvy Plus Size Blogger teeters on both racial and weight discrimination or at best, shows a lack of willingness to diversify their offerings to the over 180 countries that use their services. It just goes to show that in 2018, a global freelancing platform, such as Upwork®, has no idea that Black Panther® grossed over abillion in its first month or the fact that shows like ‘My Big Fat Fabulous Life’ or ‘My 600-lb Life’ are in their 5^th and 8^th seasons, respectively. They must not have known that Joel Book, Principal of Marketing Insights at Salesforce Marketing Cloud used the following slide in his, 'How Smart Brands Use Digital Marketing to Acquire, Engage, and Retain Customers' presentation during Salesforce's LIVE 2015 NYC Tour.

I’m sorry.  Clearly, she’s a beautiful, curvaceous woman of color, whom Mr. Book made mention that ‘other’ consumers are listening to the 'wisdom' of. Is it safe to assume that the wisdom to which he referenced came from plus size women of color? Oh no, Upwork® couldn’t have known that either. And oh, they must not also be privy to the fact that according to the CDC, ‘more than one-third of adults are obese⁴’’ in the U.S. alone or the fact that the weight loss industry is a 68.2 billion-dollar industry⁵; which by the way primarily consists of… what for it…curvy, plus-size folks; who by the way may need to read a blog or two about health and fitness. No, they couldn’t have known all this. But perhaps their six global shareholders and board of Directors may want to bring this to their profile review team and reconsider that they’re possibly missing out on a market share that perhaps one day a curvy, plus size chick as myself, might take over…in my Austin Powers voice. I know it's Dr. Evil, but you get the point. :)

Big Girl Takeover

I wrote this post not out of bitterness of being rejected. Because if you knew my life story, then you know I am numb to rejection. I’m a big girl (no pun intended). I know how to take a no. But how many other curvy, plus-size people, of all nationalities have been rejected, simply because some thought there was no market share for what they had to offer? How many have walked away discouraged; only to be comforted by what caused them to be curvy in the first place? (#comfortfoods) Nope, I refuse to believe that there’s no opportunities or room for us on those platforms. Sure, we might need a little more room than others, but certainly we can add value to every industry. But for every door being guarded by those who try to ignore the plus-sized community, who by the way are too large to be overlooked; please know, we’re coming. One super market share at a time. (#icouldntresist) And in case you’re in need of a Curvy Plus Size Blogger, holla at ya girl at https://curvyplussizeblogwriting.godaddysites.com/. Oh, I wasn’t playing. I’m going to get my piece of that market share, one post at a time. And if you’re a plus-sizer, I encourage you to do the same. #thickfolksrock

SOURCES:

1, 3  - “Upwork.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 11 Mar. 2018, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Upwork.

2 - Plus-Size Women's Clothing Stores - US Market Research Report.” Plus-Size Women's Clothing Stores (US) - Industry Report | IBISWorld, 11 Mar. 2018, www.ibisworld.com/industry-trends/specialized-market-research-reports/consumer-goods-services/apparel-accessories-stores/plus-size-womens-clothing-stores.html.

4 - https://www.cdc.gov/obesity/data/adult.html

5 - https://blog.marketresearch.com/top-6-trends-for-the-weight-loss-market-in-2018

 

 Copyright 2018 © Real Issues Publishing®. All rights reserved.

 

The Some-Thing or Some-Body Excuse

About five months ago, while I was on that '30-Day Faith Detox', I told myself that I was finally tired of being overweight. I even insisted that I have NEVER felt that way in all my twenty-eight years of struggling with my weight. I thought that by wearing a variety of veggies and fruits that would do the trick. Then I decided to step my game up and buy containers so that I could have pre-prepared meals. So I went out and spent a hot $20 on the containers, washed them up and told myself, this was it. Was it? Uh-no (in my Damon Wayans voice)! Those containers are still on my top shelf, lookin'-like-they-lookin'. Though I did complete the 30 days, I failed to prepare my meals so as to avoid having to write this post today. 

What I'm starting to see, is that when it comes to losing weight, we all tend to make excuses. 'If I could afford to go to the gym', 'If I had a treadmill', 'I need a juicer and a food processor', or 'I need to prepare my meals.' It's always some-thing or some-body else that will make our weight loss dreams come true. I even went so far as to tell myself that I was waiting on my future husband to be my personal trainer because I wanted us to be like those couples doing they thang as they worked out together. Well, let me be 100 when I tell you that may not happen. Seeing as I've not been on a date in over 15 years. Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to tell y'all that I've been celibate for the past 5,475 days. So me saying that I'm waiting on my baby is prolly an excuse. Because at the end of the day, no container, appliance, membership, or trainer can help me lose this weight. These 235 lbs are all on me.

Unclean Foods

About five months ago, I started a '30-Day Faith Detox'. While reading the first chapter, the Lord started to give me a bit of understanding about the foods I'd been eating. The author, Laura Harris Smith said, "Your body will be detoxing all day long as you consume each CLEANSING food or drink", which got me to thinking. If fruits and veggies CLEANSE or CLEAN the body, then by default, that would make everything else UNCLEAN. Which also got me to thinking, 'Hey...that means I've been putting unclean food in my body.' 

Unclean foods cause weight gain, poor skin, fatigue, and diseases. Hence, explaining why I'd been experiencing the latter all these years. Oh the a-ha of uncleanness. Was it enough to keep me from consuming unclean foods? Not quite. After the 30-days was over, I tried to keep it up. But then fell prey to the one-day-off rule. Needless to say, that one day turned into more that 150 and thus I must begin again. Am I disheartened? A little. But as with any journey, the Lord allowed me to put that in my weight loss rolodex to use...for such a time as this. #herewegoagain

AB-CD is the Goal

I absolutely adore my curves. Seriously. And as such, this time, instead of trying to lose weight, I'm going to work on accentuating those curves. Yep. I'm going to Big Girl Body Shape. Body Shaping is usually for skinny chicks or those trying to bulk up. It's when a Personal Trainer tells a booty-less person to do extra squats, in order to get a little junk. I've decided to take it to a new level and embrace my hips, thighs, and buttocks. Keep the thickness but tone it up. Compliment my slimlike waist with a flat tummy. That way when I look at myself from the side, instead of always thinking, 'If only I could lose that stomach', it'll be that the stomach is gone. You know what I mean?

Long gone are the days of wanting to be 120lbs. While that would be nice...real nice (in my Bernie Mac voice), it is no longer my goal. Why not enjoy the fact that I'm thick...like that (in my Mr. Hotspot voice)! And why don't you? Instead of making some far off weight loss goal of 25, 50, or 100 pounds, why don't we accentuate and work on one area at a time? Preferably, our bellies. But here's the thing. I'm not here to provide fitness tips. No ma'am, that's not my call. My assignment is to encourage and inspire you to find your own ab-cd workout. Yes, that's right. For now, we have abcd's! But that's okay. We are going to lose that d and work our way to the c; even if it takes two years. So you with me? Good! Now go find you an ab workout that works for your body type.

Inconsistent Intent

I started this blog on June 11, 2012 with the intention of writing regularly. As you can see, I wrote a total of:

• 5 posts in 2012,
• 1 whooping post in 2013
• None for 2014
• Zilch for 2015
• 6 in 2016 and...
• Zero in 2017

The ironic part about it is that describes much of my weight loss journey; inconsistency. The hard truth about it, is that after 6 years I'm heavier than I was when I started. When I started this blog, I was 170 lbs and for me that was overweight. Fast forward 6 years and I'm 235. 2-3-5. Wait. What now? Yep, 235 lbs. You'd think I'd have it together now especially since I'm no longer a food stamp recipient. I mean the purpose of the blog was to teach those in the hood how to eat healthy. Unfortunately, due to my inconsistency, that didn't turn out so well.  And for that, I apologize. But the last 6 years have not been all bad.

I moved out of state and managed to get down to 146 lbs in 2014. But after another financial crisis and short stint in a homeless shelter, I returned home and gained it all back and then some. But how does that happen? Quite honestly, laziness. You see, I'm not lazy in the usual sense. Believe it or not, I have a stellar work ethic - when it comes to helping and working for others. However, when it comes to Staci Sweet & Company and being the CEO of me, I don't do as well. I take care of, support, and protect everyone else, but usually manage to neglect taking care of myself. So here I go...again...on this weight loss journey. Only this time, I'm going to let this weight stay lost. I have no intention of bringing it back with me or trying to find it again.

Big Girls and Faith

After forty plus years of seeing NOTHING but skinny or average built women, it's so refreshing to see someone with thighs like mine.  Oh, don't get me wrong.  I'm not championing lumps and bumps, but when you've been bombarded with images of photo shopped perfection, you begin to question - 'Am I the only one with creases in my thighs?'  But with the sudden explosion of plus sized women gracing magazine covers, the Gram, and Twitter; its just good to know that there are women like me - who exist.  And not only exist, but unashamedly flaunt their curves.  W.O.W. 

 

And even though I don't condone showing a lot of skin, I must admit, as a Christian woman, when I see unapologetic curvy women, I see God.  But why?  Because when I see them, I see faith. I'll show you what I mean.  Take a look below.

 

 

Though I don't condone showing a lot of skin, when I look at this picture, I see them through my eyes of faith; meaning, I can look beyond the lumps and bumps and into potential. Potential of who she'll become once the weight comes off.   I can look at her, as I do myself, and see 'those things that be not as though they were.' (Rom 4:17) And until she gets there, I can appreciate and celebrate her journey as I will mine.  And I encourage you to do the same.  Everybody is not a size 2-10 and neither do we have to be.  But until and if we get there, love who you are and more importantly, have faith in God that He'll get you there.